Marriage, and all that fun stuff.

So, I am getting married. You may have guessed it. To Brant.

I've gotten a lot of feedback about this. The majority of people who matter to me a being really supportive. Though there are a few people think I am too young, too immature, too whatever.... And it is really getting to me. Yes, I am young, but I am far from immature. I am 20 and living on my own. I am taking care of myself. I have good credit. And while I am still trying to figure out things like medical bills, I am supporting not only myself, but Brant as well. I am not scared to work two jobs, or pick up shifts. I understand that you have to work hard. And I am fairly responsible. In the ten months I have been on my own I have learned that I cannot just drop cash. And I have learned how to only buy what I can afford and what I need.

I mean, yeah we have been together less than a year. We will be getting married on the seven month mark. But if a girl isn't sure about marrying a guy after the first six months, chances are she will never be sure. And we have been talking about marriage, kids, pets, education, and career plans since two to three months in. We have been preparing for it for months. It all just came faster than we planned. But at the end of the day, I am ready for this, and I know Brant is more ready for marriage than he was a mission. And everyone was so supportive of him going on the mission field.

While weddings can be stressful between the cost, invites, vows, and everything else, I am really excited. I cannot wait to spend the rest of my life with Brant. He is amazing, and honestly I do not see my future without him. I do not know how I am so sure. But I know. And I knew the minute I realized I do not want to spend another day without him. And isn't that what it is all about at the end of it all? I know that I want to spend the rest of my life with him. I want him there when I am laughing and crying.

I love coming home to him in out new apartment and telling him about my day. I love sharing the good and bad. I love that he tells me about his day. Even the small details I could live without.  He is what makes waking up in the morning wonderful. He hums me to sleep at night. We talk all the time about everything. I console him when he cries about the things in his life that make him sad. And I am more than happy he chose me to be the one who wipes away his tears. The woman he kisses every night before bed.

No matter what happens, I know Brant will be there for me, with me.  He was there for me when I was sick and had no idea why. He was at the hospital with me when I had to go in to emergency surgery. He has taken me to a psych unit when I needed the extra help. And thought I needed to be put back on medications (for the record, the doctor did not think I needed medication). I know he can handle what life will throw at us. And I know that I can go him for anything.

I guess what bothers me most is the fact that the people who support me are the people who know the most about Brant and me, our relationship. And the ones who are not so supportive are the ones who really do not know the half of it.

But this is the time to be joyous. I am in love. And I am getting married in 3 days. And at the end of it. I am so god damn happy.